February 2nd, 2006


Poster child for corporate America

I just had to sit through a telephone in-service?! That was the stupidest piece of claptrap I think I ever had the misfortune of seeing in my life.

*Sighs of disgust...*

Today has been particularly stressful. Everyone has been asking me about everything under the sun. I even got royally chewed out by Joann for basically letting a discharge sit in my desk. Something that wasn't my fault per-se. I was told that it couldn't be put in the computer system because it was on the wrong form.

Bad days like this are gentle nudges that I need to go back to school and finish what I started. I think I know what I want to go back for now too. I know I change my mind more then some people change underwear but I really think I have something in mind that I want to do.

I'm going to go back to school for Psychology. Where this will take me or what I will do with a psychology degree I don't know. There's a part of me that wants to become a psychiatrist, but I'm 28 and medical school is very, very expensive and takes years to finish when you're in school fulltime. Imagine how long it'll take me with working fulltime and trying to go to school part-time.

But I don't know. I have this need to help people and I'm seriously interested in the inner workings of the mind. Then today I was reading this article in the Philadelphia Weekly about the young soldiers that have come back from Iraq and how they are seriously suffering from PTSD and how the government or the VA aren't much help.

Oh my God, this one girl said that they were giving her the wrong psych drugs. That what they were giving her was actually making her symptoms worse. Oh it was sad. But I figured that if I was a psychiatrist I could do something to help soldiers or people who don't often get the good help the desperately need. And I did vow that the only way I'd ever work in healthcare ever again was if I was a psychiatrist.

I don't know. I'm all full of ambition but then I go through these bouts of extreme laziness which puts me off my goal. But maybe I'll have to turn over a new leaf. Instead of being lazy, I'll turn my laziness into a means of making me work harder...

I say this as I shrug off working my client list for doing a diary entry... Right... But I think I want to at least try. Can't fault a girl for trying can you.

And if this doesn't work, I do have my back-up scenario about being a writer and starting my own magazine. Something that will take equally as long as trying to become a psychiatrist. So either way you slice it, it's going to take me a few years to get my dreams on track. But nothing good ever happened by sitting on your ass waiting for good things to happen.

All good things come with a decent amount of hard work. I'm willing to do that hard work to finish school and help those people who really need help. That's my dream... I want to be part of the solution instead of the problem (Which is really usually what I am).

Woo-hoo: I feel very ambitious today, which is a good thing I guess.

Barf: Having kinda a bad day today, but it's what's going to drive me to go back to school.

Current Music: Harry Gregson-Williams Debriefing background music from Metal Gear Solid 3 Snake Eater