aachannoichi (aachannoichi) wrote,

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I want Wesker back and I know how to get him!

Yeah, it's one of those entries tonight...  In fact I'll go you one better.

You know how crazy people sit in darkened rooms huddled around a computer screen coming up with all kinds of wild conspiracy theories on Roswell, the JFK assassination, and why all the streets in Washington DC make a gigantic pentagram?  Well, this entry is kinda like that, but not really.  Although, I did spend some time huddled over my laptop screen hashing this out and I do have a conspiracy theory for Resident Evil and how they can bring Wesker back from the dead once again.  But don't worry, it's something logical and sensible (which is why I know Crapcom would never do it, but still!).  Ok, check this out!



So, I did some digging around and thought of something, if Carla Radames can run around pretending to be Ada Wong, then why couldn't someone else run around and pretend to be Wesker.  Ok, hear me out on this.  Now according to the old Resident Evil game and my custom made Wesker dogtag, Wesker's height was 6 feet exactly (or 183cm for those of you around the world using the proper Metric System).  So why was he 6'3/ 190cm in Resident Evil 5? 

Now I know what you're going to say, "Well, he was injecting himself with Uroboros and it affected his height."  And I say to you that I'm not buying it.  Grant it, the Progenitor Virus and all subsequent viruses have regenerative properties, but regeneration shouldn't effect height, unless there was something wrong with his legs, which I doubt.

But there's this height discrepancy thing.  You also have the fact that Wesker is still aging.  Why is he still aging despite being techincally dead.  Grant it, yes again the Progenitor Virus thing, but if you're dead, Progenitor Virus or no Progenitor Virus, you really shouldn't be aging at all, because you're dead.  The aging process should stop once you die, even with the magic of regeneration and reserection.  I know the arugment here is, "Well Sherry, Jill, and Leon were all infected with various virus strains and they are still aging."  Yeah, but they also didn't die!  The cannon for Resident Evil is Wesker gets killed by Tyrant, hence the aging process should stop!  So why in RE5 was he looking slightly older?  Things that make you go hmmm?

Then there is this whole deal with Wesker suddenly having a British Accent.  So ok, as far as we know Wesker was born and raised in the United States.  In both the original, director's cut, and GameCube remakes of Resident Evil Wesker had an American accent.  He had one in Code Veronica and I think in some of those other side games too.  What exactly is up with that anyway?  I have an idea what's going on with that.

I propose that the sad individual who died splashing around in that lava pit was not Albert Wesker, but his brother in the Wesker Project, the only other survivor of the Progenitor Virus injection he'd received, the twelfth specimen, and Oswell E. Spencer's lapdog Alex Wesker!


I mean check it out, Oswell E. Spencer was of "British nobility" and Alex Wesker was supposedly raised by Spencer, hence the British accent.  Also Spencer said that Alex was and I quote "so adept at absorbing the talents of others simply by observing them".  So could it be that he spent so much time observing Wesker that he became obsessed with him and adopted his persona like Carla did?  Alex also didn't die, so he would continue to age like all the others who were previously infected with the other viruses.  Also it is said that no one knows what happened to this dude.  Something about he stole the research he was doing for Spencer and no one knows where he is or if he is alive.  So I submit to you that, it was Alex Wesker who created Uroboros and it was Alex Wesker who cause all that craziness in RE5, and it was Alex Wesker and not Albert Wesker who died a pitiful death splashing around in lava.

You're welcome Resident Evil Fans!

Now that you are armed with this knowledge, you should go forth and spread it around the internet and ask, neigh, demand that Crapcom bring back Albert Wesker and not anything so foolish as to kill him off ever again.
Tags: albert wesker, crapcom, really?!, resident evil series, video games

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